‘I am riding a unicorn pulling a wagon full of rainbows…’

My friend Cheeseman and I had a little state of the union talk last night. Now, there’s no conceivable reason on earth why Cheeseman and I should be friends other than I like saying his last name—Cheese Man. He’s a conservative, white Republican who listens to UB40 and lives in a McCondo. But, here I am, years later, still rapping with the Cheese Man. I think it’s because, while he is a Republican twat on many issues, he is an adamant supporter of abortion and porn, which I can wholeheartedly get behind.

So, anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah, the state of the union, you know the whole, what-the-fuck-am-I-doing-with-life talk? I took the summer off from figuring out what was next or making any goals, but now that the delicate leaves are turning crispy and golden and falling, and I’ve switched from clear to brown liquor, I have some life decisions I’ve put off that need to be back on the frontburner.

The whole point of this blog is trying and seeing if I like certain things. But I think it would help me if I would enumerate some of these goals. I need to focus. Here is a start:

  • Get a dog.
  • Get laid on a regular basis.
  • Travel a whole lot more, which means…
  • Ditching the day job and living the dream…
  • Of working full-time from home, or
  • Wherever I choose to live that will probably not be New York
  • Because I want a yard to put the dog in and have barbecues and hang out with friends
  • Who also like to go mountain biking, camping and all that outdoorsy shit that I miss because I live in a city of concrete where idiots wait in line to sit on a patch of grass in Central Park.

Whew. That wasn’t so hard? Now, I just gotta figure out the whole no-money, way-to-live-without-working bit. Baby steps, baby steps.

If I manage to make this happen it would indeed be like riding a unicorn through a pasture of rainbows for reals. Because I found that quote on someone else’s glorious supergay blog and goddammit, doesn’t it sound nice?

One Reply to “‘I am riding a unicorn pulling a wagon full of rainbows…’”

  1. I like the new blog. You might get a yard and a dog, but that will never tame your wild ways.


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